Remember to Privately Cry

The past year and half has been a time of uncertainty and transition for Corey and me. As his NFL career has slowly come to and end, I have been sad to let go of the life we’ve known and have feared the unknown future. Even though I have a hard working and smart husband who I trust completely with our future, I have still had many moments of frustrations and tears. I do my best to keep those tears quiet in the still of the night, because I know, he too, has his fears and concerns. Yet, many times those tears and frustrations come out.

While flipping through the pages of one of my grandmother’s books, God provided me with exactly what I needed to read today.  I was looking for a poem about children but instead I came across a poem directed straight to my heart; a little wisdom from my grandmother about being a wife.

We live in a world that says put yourself first, let your feelings out, and let your voice be heard – and yes, there are times that is true.  However, there are times as a wife that we need to keep our mouths shut, “privately cry,” and trust in the man God has created to lead you. I feel as if I am sitting in my grandmother’s bedroom and she is softly telling me, “Cissie, your heart will adjust to the length of his stride, the song he is singing, the trail he must ride.” I do pray, my heart will adjust.

Love

Without clinging;

cry

if you must-

but privately cry;

the heart will adjust

to the newness of loving

in practical ways:

cleaning

and cooking

and sorting out clothes,

all say, “I love you.”

when lovingly done.

So-

love

without clinging;

cry –

if you must-

but privately cry;

the heart will adjust

to the length of his stride,

the song he is singing,

the trail he must ride,

the tensions that make him

the man that he is,

the world he must face,

the life that is his.

 So

love

without clinging;

cry-

if you must-

but privately cry;

the heart will adjust

to being the heart,

not the forefront of life;

a part of himself,

not the object-

his wife.

So-

Love!

-Ruth Bell Graham